Tuesday, December 29, 2009


I'm officially the woman of the house. That's it.
Me. And the poinsetta bush.
So far I've:
Scraped the sidewalks.
Cooked ham hock and bean soup.
Watered the poinsetta bush. (not afraid to bribe my friends.)
Checked the mail.
Brought in the garbage can.
Reprogrammed the thermostat.
Bought Grandma balloons.
I feel productive.
Soup? Anyone?

Monday, December 28, 2009


If I choose not to believe in it, it doesn't exist, right?

Sunday, December 27, 2009

Reverse Psychology: will it work?

My mother has recently discovered that I have feet issues. Don't like them, don't touch them, don't like them to be touched, etc. The more I think about one of the gifts that I received under the Christmas tree (signed, from Bigfoot), the more I laugh-at her and the gift. She got me a stress relieving foot scrub and cream from Bath and Body Works. It's name is Tranquil Mint. She told me "it's stress relieving! and is to be used daily! so we can break you in slowly!" Good grief. Oh my mother.

Thursday, December 24, 2009


While I was in DC last spring we stopped at the Old Post Office. It was a beautiful building with some of the greatest views I have ever seen of the city. It is no long an actual post office. The basement is some sort of touristy mall and while we were there, there was a stage set up with a jazz band. There was a mini-museum inside the tower where I learned something that I think I may have already known.

The United States Postal Service is slowly becoming obselete. It is being replaced slowly by the eco-friendly world of electronic mail. I approve. And yet, it saddens me. This year, I ordered some gifts (that are no larger than a greeting card) for a few friends online. Ignoring the recommendation to us UPS rather than USPS, I chose USPS because I thought it was well ahead (5 days) of the their recommended deadline in order for things to arrive before Christmas. I've actually really enjoyed the online tracking that they have given me. And I'm beginning to understand a little more about why USPS is becoming obselete.
Detailed Results:
*Processed through Sort Facility, December 20, 2009, 7:00 am, PHOENIX, AZ 85043
*Processed through Sort Facility, December 21, 2009, 11:07 pm, DENVER, CO 80217
*Processed through Sort Facility, December 23, 2009, 5:23 pm, SALT LAKE CITY, UT 84199
Denver? Really? Last time I checked, the quickest route between two locations is a straight line. Last time I checked, Denver was not part of a straight line between Salt Lake and Phoenix. Last time I checked, both Phoeniex and Salt Lake were major cities with postal processing units. At any rate, I'm not mad, angry, or even frustrated. I'm just fascinated. And glad that I'm not going to see these particular friends until next week.

***8 hours later: my expected package arrived.

Monday, December 21, 2009

I took my parents and grandmother out to look at Christmas lights tonight. During the middle of the Amazing Grace light spectacular, Dad got a phone call from my brother. He had just received the results from his last CPA exam. He graduated 8 months ago and has officially passed all 6 of his CPA exams. Congrats Squeeg! We're proud.

Friday, December 18, 2009

You know what makes me happy? Cheese. I really like gouda. Smoked gouda. I also really like the fact that I can go to Harmon's, talk to my friends Steve (the bread guy) and Alex (the cheese guy), and walk away with all the necessary parts for a perfect grilled cheese sandwich. I also love the fact that I can introduce Grandma and Mary Ellen and Myrnie to the fabulous stuff and have them actually eat and enjoy it. Cheese. Who know it was so wonderful?

Wednesday, December 16, 2009

couldn't be happier...

I will freely give WICKED the rights to the title of this entry, however, WICKED has absolutely nothing to do with the happiness that I am currently experiencing. Mother Nature threw me a bone and it snowed on my birthday. I was able to spend the day with good friends and family and enjoy food and company to last at least until next year.
I'd like to announce that I've officially/unofficially finished my Christmas shopping. I have something for everyone (except my nephew [which I find ridiculously ironic considering he should be the easiest to shop for]). Shopping for Grandma has been more (and less) difficult than originally anticipated and I have laughed more at her gift than any other. After the sub-zero (literally) cold spell we had a few weeks ago, I broke out my trusty hot water bottle. Grandma got jealous. Her's met it's unfortunate demise a few years back. TA DA!!! Stroke of genius. I could get Grandma a hot water bottle. She had looked rather envious when I showed her my Chilean bottle complete with fleece bag to cover it so it won't get too hot (or cold). Finding the fleece was super easy-however, the bottle itself proved to be a bit more complicated. I ended up at the local WALGREEN's at 9:00pm on Monday night. Having walked the aisles for 20 minutes, the bottle was procured and I proceeded to the check out counter to meet Anthony. Oh Anthony. He looked about 16, but knowing my estimation capabilities...he was probably 18-skinny jeans, shaggy hair, and all. He looked closely at the box and read out loud, "Latex Free Hot Water Bottle."
I said, "Yup. It's what Grandma wants for Christmas."
"A latex free hot water bottle?"
My response: "I don't think she really cares whether it's latex-free or not. It's all you have back there."
"Well, I guess ROCKBAND doesn't really apply to Grandma does it?"
"No. Not really."
I made my way quickly and quietly to my car and laughed out loud. Literally. I couldn't drive.
I have absolutely no idea why I found it to be so funny. Apparently, I'm looking for the small blessings. I think it might have to do with the fact that I played ROCKBAND with 3 cousins last year on Christmas Eve and I've never seen my grandmother look so bored. It could be the fact that she blatantly announced that she doesn't like entertainment from "my generation." "Her generation" is more enjoyable. I guess there's a generational gap.
I guess I just feel blessed.
It's been a good month. Snow. Birthday. Snow shoes. Muppet Christmas Carol. Egg Nog. Hot water bottles. Family. Phone calls. My family will all be here by this time next week. Really what more could I ask for? I really have enough that I can spare and share. I don't think that I could be happier.

Tuesday, December 8, 2009

Me parece...

It appears to me that I have more Chilean in me than I originally thought. It's cold and it's dark so I'm going to bed. What else would I do? My favorite Chilean part of all of this is the fact that I'm going to bed with my guatero* for the first time since my mission. I'm saddened by the fact that I really forgot the glory of one, but I'm currently adding it to my list of blessings for the day (and there are a plethora). Good night and farewell.

*hot water bottle

Monday, December 7, 2009

today is the day...

I know. It's way past my bedtime, but I have to announce 2 things. Today is the day that:
1) I lengthened 2 pairs of pants. That means I now have 2 more pairs that I can wear on non-"wear your pajamas to work" days.
2) I diffused a family misnomer. Actually, I think Grandma did. Since I was a freshman in college, I've been getting the "I was married by the time I was your age" comments from my grandmother. I recently learned that she was not as concerned as I originally perceived. While Grandpa was in the hospital, recovering from anesthesia, he told my cousin that I needed to get a job in the athletics office on campus, so that one of the big athletes could sweep me off my feet. I soon thereafter learned that he was the one that was concerned for my well-being. Today we found actual, physical proof. Grandma has been cleaning out Grandpa's office and found something AMAZING today. Random excerpts from a book called HOW TO MAKE A MAN FALL IN LOVE WITH YOU. Because of the previously mentioned pants, I haven't had the necessary time to fully appreciate the glory that is paper-clipped before me. I'll keep you posted. I just wanted to leave you with a few of the affirmations found on page 29.
I, ____________ ____________, am about to find the man I want.
I, ____________ ____________, deserve all the love I am entitled to, and I will find it soon.
I, ____________ ____________, am about to have a wonderful loving relationship with a man who really loves me as much as I love him.
I hope they work for you all as much as they will work for me. Don't you worry...more goodness to come.

Thursday, December 3, 2009

one of the hardest things to realize is that someday is right now.

It's December 3rd, 2009. I woke up this morning and the thermometer on my computer read 12 degrees. That sounds about right for December in Utah. My only grievance is the fact that it 12 degrees with NO SNOW!!! I'm having a hard time dealing with December because there isn't white stuff on the ground. That does not change the fact that tomorrow is December 4th and the day after that is December 5th and 25 days after that is January 1st, 2010. I've had a realization. As a little girl, I dreamed of where I am now. Now, I dream of where I will be 5-10 years from now. It's no wonder that I feel like I missed August, September, October, and November of this year. I don't really remember taking the time to appreciate it.
Here are my most recent blessings:
*Flowers from a secret admirer.
*My strawberries didn't freeze until Thanksgiving.
*Random emails, phone calls, and texts.
*Weather cold enough that the car DOESN'T frost over.
Things I'll do in the next month to continue to appreciate it ALL.
~Take Grandma out for my birthday.
~Incorporate 'schmaltzy' into my vocabulary. (it's a family thing)
~Gum. not. M&M's.
One step at a time, I WILL accept the fact that SOMEDAY is NOW!

Monday, November 30, 2009

Volunteers? Anyone?

So. A friend of mine started with a personal trainer today. The only thing I really heard about it was the fact that there was soreness inflicted upon locations of the body previously unknown to human kind and then, perhaps, a little bit more.
As I sit here-wasting time-when I should REALLY be in bed-I had a genius realization. I need a personal trainer. Perhaps not the full-body pain inflicting variety. I can do a decent enough job of that on my own. I need someone to train me to actually drag myself out of bed in the morning. As a teenager, I can't tell you how many glasses of water were dumped on my bed nor can I tell you how many times I nearly lost the speakers on my stereo to MORE THAN A FEELING because the volume had been turned to the max. How exactly, I managed to survive my college experience completely baffles me. (Or maybe not so much. I don't think the English department really functions before 10:00am.) In the mean time...I still HATE waking up with a passion. I don't mind being awake early in the morning. I am actually ultra-productive in the morning and LOVE to watch the sunrise...it's just the whole waking-up part. Pointers? Anyone?

Saturday, November 28, 2009

Black Friday

I've been thinking. I don't know exactly how to classify these thoughts so it may come out in the traditional unknown format.
I considered participating in the American phenomenon known these days as Black Friday. It completely baffles me. How did the term shift from the day that the stock market crashed to the day after Thanksgiving when the Christmas retail season actually starts? Why do we have to wake up at 3:00am to get the best prices? Really, I'm sure the employees would be just as happy to see us at 9:00am and would be more than willing to give us the same prices. When did it become acceptable to draw blood over $3 pajamas? When I say 'considered participating', I mean I set an alarm for 5:00, 6:00, 6:05, 7:00, and finally woke up at about 8:00. I was at the stores by 9:00, finished by 10:00, and still had all of my Christmas shopping done for $40 less than I actually budgeted for. I would consider that a successful shopping trip AND I still got 8 hours of sleep.
I guess the reason that I'm so baffled by all of this might have something to do with the fact that I watched Elizabeth Gaskell's NORTH AND SOUTH earlier this week. I'm fascinated by the relationship of unions and masters and the power necessary to cause and continue a strike. I think it applies to Black Friday. The only reason it starts so early is because people actually go. If people didn't go, there would be NO reason for it to start that early. I think I'll go for Cyber Monday next year.

Thursday, November 26, 2009

The Deciding Moment.

Well...I don't like to compliment myself, but my family and friends do tell me that I can bake a mean turkey. It was pretty tasty. As of this moment, the tryptophan has officially kicked in and I am going to bed. Happy Thanksgiving to all and to all a good night!

Wednesday, November 25, 2009

Round 3: The Night Before

So. It's the night before Thanksgiving. I forgot to flip my turkey this morning before I went to work. (I'm sorry. That sounded like a horribly cheesy Thanksgiving version of a 'flip your lid' joke.) I checked on him after work and I'm not going to lie...he looked and smelled pretty awesome-and this is coming from a girl with no sense of smell. The parents arrived and like a giddy school girl I ran out to my cooler with my mom to show off my project and compare notes (she'd brined 2 turkeys in four days last week). As we added ice to my bird, she looked at him and said "did your turkey have a bowel movement?" Apparently, she just brined her turkey in salt water: salt + water. No spices. The spiced out variety was completely foreign to her. Not my fault. She told me that if I quoted her, she'd deny it. Take it for what you will...apparently, it may or may not be true. Well all (I suppose there are about 5 of you)...I hope you have a fantastic holiday full of good food, plesant company, and many thanks. The more I think about my blessed life, the more I realize exactly how blessed I am. Happy Thanksgiving.

Tuesday, November 24, 2009

Round 2: The suprise attack.

My parents called me tonight to tell me that they may or may not launch a suprise attack on Thanksgiving. (I'll bet they don't believe that I'm actually cooking the turkey this year either.) I've got all the necessities for the brine: kosher salt, coriander, peppercorn, mustard, bay leaves...it's gonna be FABULOUS. Tonight's plan? One large cooler + two brick of ice + one previously mentioned turkey + random assortment of spices, salts, and sugars.

*Three hours later...
Well, the suprise attack may be a surplus of thyme. That's what I get for measuring over my pan of boiling water. You can't really take it out once it hits the water. To be completely honest, the house smells AWESOME. We'll just see how the turkey does after his salt bath.

Monday, November 23, 2009

Round One.

Turkey purchased.
Who knew there were so many options? Fresh turkey, frozen turkey, seasoned turkey, tofurkey? Thanks to my dear friend Anna who so kindly donated Turkey Dollars to my cause, I thought I walked away with a decent deal. I wouldn't call it fabulous, but let's be honest here-I'm still a newbie. My worthy opponent currently sits in the fridge in the garage. If he only knew...

Sunday, November 22, 2009

The Game Plan:

For one year I've been planning Thanksgiving dinner. I had an incredible holiday last year and I loved it. Since then, I've wanted to cook this year. I guess it's some sort of rite of passage: guys shoot animals, girls take over Thanksgiving Dinner. This year, I'm going to do it. I'm taking over the turkey.

Saturday, November 21, 2009


I'd like to make an announcement. Tonight, I laughed so hard that I cried for a good hour. I got home and Grandma asked me if I am catching a cold because my voice is so hoarse. Some of the girls at work got together for a Girl's Night. It was desperately needed. It has been a rough month at work and I've recently realized that I need to be more aware of what is going on around me and the blessings that I do have. I work with good people.

Thursday, November 19, 2009

bliss bits

my nephew calls me 'yaya'. apparently he says 2 words: 'no' and 'yaya'.
one perk to extended christmas shopping season is an extended season for mint m&m's.
sweet potato biscuits
i left work before the sun went down once this week.
65 days

Tuesday, November 17, 2009

Phrase of the Day...

Tuesdays make me wonder what it was like to truly be bored. Was I really bored with my life? After a 9 hour work day and 3 1/2 hours of absolute values, systems of equations, polynomials, latin roots, and sentence completion, I encountered a phrase that made me laugh so hard that I nearly cried. Energetic delirium. That's it. Energetic delirium. Now. I plan to sleep so that I can continue my energetic delirium tomorrow. And the day after. And the day after that. It's gonna be GREAT!

Sunday, November 15, 2009


So I got another batch of Sunday afternoon homework. This one stemmed out of the fact that I was asked to speak in church on gratitude. I asked a friend for advice and this was his response:
I am afraid I have no good advice for a talk on gratitude, except--wait!--here is an idea I was mulling over earlier.
Heavenly Father never says "thank you".
That one startled me the first time I thought about it; it still does, actually. It makes perfect sense when you think about it for a lot of reasons, starting with what would He thank us for? But it also points up how much gratitude we owe him, since our position is the perfect reciprocal of His; viewed correctly, we ought to thank Him for pretty much everything (I am not quite sure about thanking Him for other people's sins, or our own, but we certainly ought to thank Him for our weaknesses, as Ether 12 points out).

I'm not going to lie. When I read this comment this morning, my head nearly exploded. I've been thinking about it all day. This is more or less what I have come up with. (Here comes the bullet list...)
* He really doesn't say 'Thank You'. I'm mind-boggled. I think the closest thing we get is 'Well done thou good and faithful servant'. We do get blessings though. I suppose He could thank us for our obedience, but really...the blessings come because we comply with the stipulated guidelines.
* When I was a teenager in Sunday school, my teacher taught us a lesson on service. He was feeling very blessed one day and decided that he wanted to thank the Lord for all of his blessing and tried to decide exactly how he could go about doing that. He decided to work at the church farm one Saturday to pay back the Lord for the good feeling that he had when he served others. He soon found out that the harder he worked, the more he felt that good feeling and realized that he could never pay the Lord back for that good feeling.
* PAY IT FORWARD. One of my roommates had to watch the movie for one a class and I ended up watching it with them. Great concept. Receive favors or help and rather than paying it back, pay it forward and help someone else who needs it.
Gratitude is one of the most beautiful feelings that we can have as mortals. It allows us to humble ourselves and acknowledge the blessings that we do have and where they come from. My talk is supposed to be based off of Helping Others Recognize the Whisperings of the Spirit by Sister Matsumori. I'm looking forward to re-reading and studying this talk and realizing that really, my level of gratitude truly affects the level of the spirit in my life.

Addendum: Gotta love the hometeachers. They shared this quote from E' Uchtdorf and I thought it applied. ish. Good luck thinking like I do.
" No, God does not need us to love Him. But oh, how we need to love God!"

Friday, November 13, 2009

I like Quiznos.

I was given this (I know the format is kind of a pain, but it's worth it.) at work today. I laughed.

Thursday, November 12, 2009

The Grandma Diaries...(part 5)

At what point do I become concerned that it is 8:00pm and my grandmother is not home? I made some flippant comment the other day and her response was "That wouldn't be proper. I'm in mourning." That being said, I'm pretty sure that she's not on a date. Where would you hang out if you were an 80 year old woman on a Thursday night?

Monday, November 9, 2009

I've come to the realization...

Recently, I've realized that there are only 24 hours in a day. For the next month...that terrifies me. I have WAY TOO MUCH stuff to do, but at the same time, I feel good about it. I feel like some good organization and time utilization will be beneficial AND bring me joy. Therefore, I'm getting organized. I may or may not be completely MIA, but that's okay. I'm giving you fair warning. Consider yourself warned.
As a post script...I'm officially praying for snow for the next 3 weeks. I want to turn my Thanksgiving weekend holiday into a snowshoeing trip. That would require snow. I don't even see snow in the mountains. It's not that I haven't enjoyed the Indian Summer, but I'm beginning to believe in global warming. If it doesn't freeze, the mosquitoes won't die and then we'll all die from malaria and the West Nile Virus. And we think the world is worried about H1N1. Ha! (Not to mention the fact that I just ordered a new backpack for the cruise and am under strict orders that I need to try it out before with photographic proof/evidence. What better way than snowshoeing to a yurt? I'm to cheap too actually go anywhere else until AFTER the cruise is over. Sorry folks, love you all, have a LIST of places to go and people to visit and otherwise allocated funds to finance it. [wow. that was an exceptionally long aside. sorry. i have a self-diagnosed attention problem.])

Friday, November 6, 2009

The Grandma Diaries (part 4)

I remember watching THE MAILBOX at my grandmother's house when I was a kid. To be completely honest, I'm not quite so sure that I enjoyed it very much. I always felt bad for Lethe because she was so alone. I've realized that I live with my own Lethe. The first thing that Grandma asks me when I walk in the door at night is "have you got the mail?" or "can you go get the mail?" Honestly, I quit checking the mail years ago. My game plan is to take it up again. It's going to be my new way of spreading sunshine. This Lethe won't be left alone.

Thursday, November 5, 2009

I should be...

Doing laundry.
Cleaning my room.
Cleaning my bathroom.
Reading the Book of Mormon.
Reading the Pickwick Papers.
Enhancing my GRE vocabulary.
Changing light bulbs for my grandmother.
Practicing standard deviations in 30 seconds or less.

Instead I'm:
Reading about a newborn going home.
Watching an adorable 1 year old chinese man.
Questioning whether I am smarter than a 5th grader.
Congratulating recent bar results.

Don't get me wrong, I love you all, but I'm moving on now.
Congratulate me.
I'm going to be productive now.

Sunday, November 1, 2009

72 hours

1 dead car battery
1 brand new car battery
2 heads of blue hair
2 red shirts
3 different kinds of shampoo and conditioner
4 cups of Stephens Vanilla Hot Chocolate
1 GRE Prep course
550 Boy Scouts
1 GRE Prep Test (Math score 4 percent higher than Verbal?)
4 hour road trip
2 new registration stickers
2 male waiters in drag
1 trip to the tunnels of terror
1 fantastic 80's flick
8 carmel apples
1 EXTRA hour of sleep
1 single's branch, doubled-size
1 game of wizard
1 happy girl

Wednesday, October 28, 2009

The Grandma Diaries (part 3)

Those who know me well know that if there is one thing in this world that I have a completely bipolar relationship with, it's feet. I hate feet. I think they're disgusting. I don't like to look at them. I don't like to touch them. Frankly, I'd rather pick up a snake than give someone a foot massage. (I don't know. Don't ask.) I don't like mine to be touched. I do like tan lines on my feet. That's about it. To counter this dislike, I've developed a few fetishes to help with the balance (theoretically). I love socks. I love how warm they are and I'm pretty sure that I have more socks than the rest of my wardrobe combined. Shoes. I also have a HUGE fascination with shoes. I love them. Shoes are one of the first things I notice about a person. I don't know what that means. I don't know what it says about my self-esteem, considering that the first thing I notice about a person is their feet. The really amusing part of my fascination with shoes is my personal shoe collection. or maybe lack thereof? I have one of the blandest shoe collections that I have ever encountered. I do have patent leather red ballet flats. That's probably the most exciting part of my collection, but really, I'm okay with that. I have other things that I'd like to spend my money on.
The real purpose behind this post is announce that I'm slowly getting over my issues with feet. Living with Grandma has given me opportunities to help with her shoes and socks and feet. Not my favorite part of living with Grandma. It's okay. I'm learning to get over it. Someday I'd like to get to this point. (Check out 36-38.)
It'll happen.

Monday, October 26, 2009

best. phone call. ever.

"shandy. this is jim."
"what was the name of the furry guy that gave up his inheritance for a bowl of soup?"

Sunday, October 25, 2009

The Grandma Diaries...(part 2)

I don't know how many parts there are going to be to this segment, but today we had the ceremonial lighting of our Halloween Pumpkin. I felt the urge to sing (like unto the Olympic Fanfare), but in bout of performance anxiety I couldn't think of a single Halloween song. I think at some point I learned SOMEthing. Carla-lady taught me music for 10+ years...you'd think I'd have learned at least ONE song, but nothing. I had absolutely nothing. Grandma, being the fantastic lady and never-ending font of primary songs that she is, stepped up with a song about a little jack-o-lantern sitting in a pan waiting to go into the oven. I thought it was sufficient if not appropriate.
I had a realization today. In Sunday School we were discussing Spirtual, Temporal, and Emotional Self Reliance. I had some fascinating thoughts. On my mission I felt like I got a decent understanding of spiritual self reliance and why it is important. It's amazing to see how a testimony can change and govern a person. I won't say I'm exempt to trials, but I do know that when they come there is reason in "if ye are prepared ye shall not fear." Temporally, I understand the necessity of food storage, emergency preparedness, and staying out of debt (ps as of 2 weeks ago Bojangles is officially paid off and and I'm officially debt free!). Emotional self reliance, however, was a new concept for me. And I think I liked it. It's something that I've been struggling with since I moved in with Grandma. My parents had no problem with voicing their concerns about me moving in with Grandma because I wouldn't have anyone to share the burden with. Dad had Mom, Brady had Becky, Aunt Dorice had Uncle Bob...I had my...blue blanket? Don't get me wrong, I've had amazing friends and family supporting me through all of this, but I guess it's not quite the same. I guess the realization that I had today is that emotional self reliance isn't about having someone who knows me, and what I'm thinking, and what I'm feeling. I mean, it would be nice. I'm not against it by any means, but emotional self reliance is a little different...maybe more than that. Emotional self reliance isn't necessarily being SELF reliant, but being reliant on the Lord. Really, He is the ideal one. He knows everything and has all the answers and is totally willing to give comfort and the needed blessings.
Now. Here's the real question. How do I share this with Grandma?

Friday, October 23, 2009

The Grandma Diaries...(part 1).

After a highly productive afternoon on my part (paying for a cruise, registering for a class, and getting my brakes checked), my grandmother told me that the neighbor boy across the street said he would take her out for icecream and wouldn't be ashamed to be seen with her in public. I decided at that moment that I haven't been as dilligent as I should be when it comes to spending time with my grandmother and that tonight is her night. So far it has consisted of the first quarter of the Morgan/Juan Diego football game, 2 matches of the BYU/UTAH woman's volleyball game (with a complimentary lecture on the differences of volleyball scoring since she played volleyball), and the 2006 BYU/TCU upset. I'd like to announce that despite my dislike for organized sports such as football, I am intelligent enough to know that John Beck is no longer BYU's quarterback. Yay me. Also, I apparently have taken up my grandfather's traditional post on the couch. She keeps looking over and calling me Tess. or Dorice. finally Shandy. I think I slept for an hour in the midst of all of this and I think I dreamt that I drank a gallon of milk. I think I want a glass of milk now.

Monday, October 19, 2009


Okay, so I'm not REALLY homeless, but I kind of feel it. Funny story. I walked into work on Friday to find out that there was a waterfall in my office. The dentist upstairs had a drainage issue. That made for an exciting Friday full of wet MRI's and dental water. To be completely honest, I totally forgot about it over the weekend. I felt good about that...until today. I walked in today and realized that I had no office. No desk. No computer. Really-no purpose in being here today. The thought crossed my mind that perhaps...I could go home, but then I realized that really...the only things I have to do there are change my oil and make chocolate popcorn for my hometeachers. That's not going to take ALL afternoon. I decided I'd stick it out. So here I sit. I'm working off my manager's computer. I have no desk. Everything I need is locked in a room with 2 industrial fans and a lot of noise and humidity. Yup. That's about it. The good news is there will be chocolate popcorn. Tonight.

Friday, October 16, 2009

Meet my parents.

Today they have been married 29 years.
That's 29 shared birthday cakes.
348 Months.
1508 Weeks.
10585 Days.
254040 Hours.
15242400 Minutes.
914544000 Seconds.
3 Happy kids.
and 1 FANTASTIC grandkid.
Love you Funny Old People.

Wednesday, October 14, 2009

Once again I'm taking bets...

It's October. That means it's time for me to register my car. Last year (see here) it took a little bit longer than originally planned. This year, the stickers were put in the mail 2 nights ago. Any predictions for when they will arrive?

Addendum: (4 hours later) Apparently I need to have a little faith in USPS. My registration arrived in 2 days or less. I consider myself blessed.

Monday, October 5, 2009

So I laughed.

These glorious insults are from an era before the English language got boiled down to 4-letter words?
"He had delusions of adequacy." Walter Kerr
"He has all the virtues I dislike and none of the vices I admire." Winston Churchill
"I have never killed a man, but I have read many obituaries with great pleasure." Clarence Darrow
"He has never been known to use a word that might send a reader to the dictionary." William Faulkner (about Ernest Hemingway)
"Poor Faulkner. Does he really think big emotions come from big words?" Ernest Hemingway (about William Faulkner)
"Thank you for sending me a copy of your book; I'll wast no time reading it." Moses Hadas
"I didn't attend the funeral, but I sent a nice letter saying I approved of it." Mark Twain
"He has no enemies, but is intensely disliked by his friends." Oscar Wilde
"I am enclosing two tickets to the first night of my new play; bring a friend....if you have one." George Bernard Shaw to Winston Churchill
"Cannot possibly attend first night, will attend second...if there is one." Winston Churchill, in response.
"I feel so miserable without you; it's almost like having you here." Stephen Bishop
"He is a self-made man and worships his creator." John Bright
"I've just learned about his illness. Let's hope it's nothing trivial." Irvin S Cobb
"In order to avoid being called a flirt, she always yielded easily." Charles, Count Talleyrand
"He loves nature in spite of what it did to him." Forest Tucker
"His mother should have thrown him away and kept the stork." Mae West
"Some cause happiness wherever they go; other whenever they go." Oscar Wilde
"He uses statistics as a drunken man uses lamp=posts...for support rather than illumination." Andrew Lang
"I've had a perfectly wonderful evening. But this wasn't it." Groucho Marx
"There's nothing wrong with you that reincarnation won't cure." Jack E Leonard
"He has the attention span of a lightning bolt." Robert Redford
"They never open their mouths without subracting from the sum of human knowledge." Thomas Brackett Reed
"He has Van Gogh's ear for music." Billy Wilder
"He can compress the most words into the smallest idea of any man I know." Abraham Lincoln
"A modest little person, with much to be modest about." Winston Churchill
The exchange between Churchill & Lady Astor:
She said, "If you were my husband I'd give you poison."
He said, "If you were my wife, I'd drink it."
A member of Parliament to Disraeli:
"Sir, you will either die on the gallows or of some unspeakable disease."
"That depends, Sir," said Disraeli, "whether I embrace your policies or your mistress."

Sunday, October 4, 2009

Things I'm Looking forward to...

1) My conference Ensign.
2) Visiting Em with KP. This weekend.
3) Sweater weather.
4) Watching/Listening to conference as I get ready for work for the next month.
5) Pumpkin anything: muffins, bread, cookies, pie, seeds, shakes, spice, etc.
6) Running AFTER work.
7) The last week of January.
8) Cooking Thanksgiving for Grandma.

Wednesday, September 30, 2009

sweaters and chamomile...

Today is the day that I choose to find good in the fact that there is snow in the mountains and I have a GIANT mosquito bite on my left shin. I'm sitting here trying to not eat an entire pound of almonds as I wait for a fabulous dinner with friends that I don't see nearly enough. It's the last day of September. It snowed in the mountains and rained in the valley and I celebrated it with a cup of bliss (tomato basil soup) and fresh bread sticks. Not all of my tomatoes ripened before the weather turned cold so I am toying with the concept of "fried green tomatoes"-is it really more than a film and an actual edible concoction that can provide nourishment? Love, in it's 4 greatest forms, fills my life and I choose to appreciate it. I also choose turtleneck sweaters, warm fleecy jackets, and hot chamomile tea before delving into my favorite books that are physical proof that I have a spiritual father who loves me. Everyday as I left home for school, my mother said goodbye with "Make it a good day!" Today, inadvertently, I did.

Sunday, September 20, 2009

chocolate cookies please!

I don't really know how to start this, so I'll say this...It's been an interesting week. My grandfather passed away this morning. I think for all of us, it's been a slightly surreal experience and I'm grateful that my family has been here for the bulk of it. I haven't had to go through it alone. My parents have been here and my aunt has been here. I've had some great conversations with my aunt that could easily lead me directly to grad school in the near future. (Yay for direction!) In the midst of it all, we had a discussion that went something like this:
Aunt Dorice: If anyone asks if there is anything that they can do...tell them to bring chocolate cookies.
Me: Okay...?
Aunt Dorice: We have plenty of food here. People will offer to bring meals. Tell them we need comfort food. Chocolate cookies.
Me: Alright. Right. Well, we're making banana bread. We'll put chocolate chips in it.
Aunt Dorice: That'll do, but we could still use chocolate cookies.
Me: Okay.
[A few minutes passed and the rest of the family entered the room and conversation.]
[knock at the door]

Neighbor: Hello-I was wondering how you are all doing?
Unspecified Family Member: Oh, it's been a long day...
Neighbor: Well...I was wondering if I could interest you in a pie.
[laughter from all family members]
It was a rhubarb pie. It was FABULOUS! Loved it.
Now. Re-reading this, I would like to clarify two things: 1) My aunt is NOT obsessive when it comes to chocolate cookies. My family has a very healthy appreciation (can I use that word?)for chocolate cookies. 2) I have a heightened appreciation for family and the plan of salvation. As tired as I have been for the past 2 weeks, there has been an INCREDIBLE peace in our home. I know that I'll see my grandfather again. I know that he is happy and with other friends and family members who welcomed him with his own version of "well done-thou good and faithful servant."

Wednesday, September 16, 2009

I don't know.

I don't understand.
Afrikaans - Ek verstaan nie
Albanian - Nuk kuptoj
Alsatian - Ich versteh nitt
Amharic - አልገባኝም
Arabic(Egyptian) - (ana miš fāhim) أنا مش فاهم
Arabic(Modern Standard) - (lā afham) لا أفهم
Arabic(Moroccan) - (mafhemtš) مافهمتش
Arabic(Syrian) - (māfhemit) مافهمت
Aragonese - No repleco
Arapaho - neihoowóé'in
Armenian - (Eastern) Չեմ հասկանում: (Chem haskanum)
Aromanian - Nu acãchisescu
Asante - Menté asé
Asturian - Nun pescancio
Azerbaijani - Mən sizi başa düşmürəm
Basque - Ez dut ulertzen
Belarusian - Не разумею (Ne razumeyu)
Bengali - বুঝতে পারি নি। (bujhte pari ni)
বুঝতে পারলাম না। (bujhte parlam na)
Bosnian - Ne razumijem
Breton - Ne gomprenan ket [ne gɔ̃mpʁenãn ket]
Bulgarian - Не разбирам (Ne razbiram)
Cape Verdean - N ka ta konprende
Catalan - No ho entenc
Chamorro - Ti hu komprende
Chechen - Со ца кхита (So ca qiet)
Cherokee - ᏝᎢᎪᎵᎦ (tlaigoliga)
Chinese(Cantonese) - 我唔明白 (ngóh m̀ mìhngbaahk)
Chinese(Hakka) - 𠊎唔明白 (ngai2 mm mingpakh)
Chinese(Mandarin) - 我聽不懂 [我听不懂] (wǒ tīngbùdǒng)
我不懂 (wǒ bùdǒng)
我不明白 (wǒ bù míngbai)
Chinese(Taiwanese) - 我聽無 gua2 thian-bo0
Choctaw - Ak akostinincho
Comanche - Ke nu u nakisupana?itu
Cornish - Nu gonvedhas / Ne ellam convethas
Corsican - Ùn capiscu micca
Croatian - Ne razumijem
Czech - Nerozumím
Danish - Det forstår jeg ikke
Dutch - Ik begrijp het niet
Dyula - Né ta mé
Esperanto - Mi ne komprenas [mi ne kom'prenas]
Estonian - Ma ei saa aru
Faroese - Eg skilji ikki
Fijian - E sega ni macala
Finnish - En ymmärrä [ɛn 'ymːærːæ]
French - Je ne comprends pas [ʒə nə cõ'pʁɑ̃ 'pa]
Frisian (North)- Ik begrip dåt ai
Frisian (Saterfrisian) - Iek begriep dät nit
Frisian (West) - Ik begryp it net
Friulian - No capiš un dret!
Galician - Nom entendo
German - Ich verstehe nicht [ɪç fə'ʃteːə nɪçt]
Georgian - არ მესმის (ar mesmis)
Greek - Δεν καταλαβαίνω (Then katalavéno)
Greenlandic - Paasinngilara
Guarani - Ndaikuaái la ereséva
Gujarati - સમજણ પટતી નથી (samajaṇa paṭatī nathī)
Haitian - Creole Mwen pa komprann
Hawaiian - Maopopo iaʻu ʻole
Hebrew m - (ani loh mevin) אני לא מבין
f - (ani loh mevinah) אני לא מבינה
Hindi - m मैं समझ नहीं पा रहा हूँ। (Maiṁ samajh nahṁ pā rahā hūṁ)
f मैं समझ नहीं पा रही हूँ। (Maiṁ samajh nahṁ pā rahī hūṁ)
Hmong - Kuv tsis to-taub, Kuv tsis meej pem li
Hungarian - Nem értem
Icelandic - Ég skil það ekki
Indonesian - Saya tidak mengerti
Inuktitut - ᑐᑭᓯᓐᖏᑦᑐᖕ (Tukisinngittung)
Irish (Gaelic) - Ní thuigim Cha dtuigim (Ulster)
Italian - Non capisco Non ho capito
Italian (Roman dialect) - Nun capisco
Japanese - わかりません (wakarimasen)
わからない (wakaranai) - informal
Javanese - kulo mboten mangertos
Jèrriais - Jé n'comprends pon
Karelian - Minä en ellendä
Kashubian - Jô nie rozmiejã
Kazakh - Мен түсінбеймін (Men tüsinbeymin)
Khmer - (kh'nyohm muhn yuhl te)
Kinyarwanda - Sinumva
Kiribati - I aki oota
Klingon - jIyajbe'
Komi - Ме тіянӧс ог гӧгӧрво (Me tîǎnös og gögörvo)
Korean - 모르겠습니다 (moreugesseumnida)
Kurdish - تێ ناگه م
Kyrgyz - Түшүнбөдүм (Tüšünbödüm)
Lao - ບໍ່ເຂົ້າໃຈ (baw khào ja̖i)
Latin - Nullo intellego / Nescio
Latvian - Es nesaprotu
Limburgish - Ich versjtaon neet, Ich begriep 't neet
Lingala - Na zali kososola té
Lithuanian - Aš nesuprantu
Livonian - Ma äb so aru
Lojban - mi na jimpe
Luganda - Ssitegeera
Luxembourgish - Ech verstinn net
Macedonian - Не разбирам (Ne razbiram)
Malagasy - Tsy azoko
Malay - Saya tidak faham
Maltese - M'inix nifhem / Mhux qiegħed nifhem / Ma nifhimx / Mhux nifhem
Manx - Cha nel mee toiggal
Māori - Kaore au e mārama / Aroha mai
Marathi - मला नाही समजत (malā nāhī samjat)
Mauritian - Creole Mo pas compran
Mohawk - Iah tewake'nikonhraien:ta's
Mongolian - Би ойлгохгүй байна (Bi oilgokhgui baina)
Mordvin - Мон тынк а чаркодян (Mon tynk a čarkodǎn)
Nenets - Ман’ сит нидм’ хамадамбю’ (Man’ sit nidm’ hamadambǔ’)
Nepali - मैले बुझिन (maile bujhina)
Norwegian - Jeg skjønner ikke / Jeg forstår ikke (Bokmål)
Eg forstår ikkje (Nynorsk)
Nyanja - Sindinamve
Occitan - Compreni pas
Pashto - زه پوه نه شوم
Persian - (nemifahmam) نمي فهمم (motevajjeh nemisham) متوجه نميشم
Polish - Nie rozumiem
Portuguese - Não percebo/compreendo (Portugal)
Eu não estou entendendo, Não entendi (Brazil)
Punjabi - ਮੈਂ ਨਹੀਂ ਸਮਝਦਾ (maiṅ hīṅ samajhadā)
Quechua - Mana japikkana
Quenya - umin hanyan
Romanian - Nu înţeleg
Romany - Či hačarav
Russian - Я не понимаю (Ya ne ponimaju)
Saami - Mun in ádde
Samoan - Ou te le malama lama
Sardianian - Non lu cumprendo
Scots - A dinna unnerstaund, A dinna lift
Scottish Gaelic - Chan eil mi 'tuigsinn
Serbian - Не разумем (Ne razumem)
Sesotho - Ha ke utlwisise
Shona - Handisi kunyaso nzwisisa
Sindarin - ú-chenian
Slovak - Nerozumiem
Slovenian - Ne razumem
Somali - Maan fahmin
Spanish - No entiendo No comprendo
Stellingwarfs - Ik begriep 't niet
Swahili - Sifahamu
Swazi - Angiva
Swedish - Jag förstår inte
Tagalog - Hindí ko náiintindihan
Tahitian - Aita i papu ia'u
Tamil - புரியவில்லை (puriyavillai)
Tajik - Ман намефаҳмам (Man namefaḩmam)
Tatar - Min añlamin
Telugu - నాకు అర్ధం కాలేదు ! – (naaku ardhaṅ kaalaedhu!)
Tetum - Ha'u la hatene
Thai - ไม่เข้าใจ (mâi khâo jai)
Tibetan - ཧ་གོ་མ་སོང་། (ha ko-masong)
Tigrinya - ኣይተረድኣንን (ayteredann)
Tongan - 'Oku 'ikai mahino kiate au
Tsez - Ди бич1зи рохъхāну (Di bičʼzi roqxānu)
Tswana - Ga ke tlhaloganye
Turkish - Anlamıyorum, Anlamadım
Turkmen - Мен дүшүнемок (Men düšünemok)
Udmurt - Мыным валантем (Mynym valantem)
Ukrainian - Я не розумію (Ja ne rozumiju)
Urdu - (main samjha nahin [m] / main samjhi nahin [f]) میں سمجھا نہی
Uzbek - Men tushunmayapman (frm)
Vietnamese - Tôi không hiểu
Volapük - No kapälob
Votic - Minä en eľgenda
Welsh - Dw i ddim yn deall
Xhosa - Andiva
Yiddish - (Ikh farshtey dos nit) איך פֿאַרשטיי דאָס ניט
Yorùbá - Ko ye emi
Zulu - Angizwa
And if you ask me in five minutes, my answer will not have changed.

Tuesday, September 15, 2009

I'm not apathetic.

If I were, I wouldn't work as hard as I do.

Saturday, September 12, 2009

Things to do...

I'm a list person. I always have been. I have never done really well with a planner. I've had them, but inevitabley, they get lost or substituted for wall full of sticky notes. One year at school I created a calendar on the wall above my bed, each day of the month was an 8x10 sheet of paper and I just kept lists on each day of things that needed to be done that day. Even now, there is an on going list in my mind at all times, for example:
The Parents List for Utah:
1) Snow shoes
2) Scissors
3) Sewing machine oil
4) Anchors Away (is that the one?)
Things I'd like to cook someday:
1) Crab Cakes
2) Sum Tom
3) Floating Island
Places I'd like to Visit:
1) Denver
2) Seattle
3) New York
4) Lincoln
5) Chile
I had a realization last week. This list fettish makes my college experience make so much more sense. I have a degree in English and because of that people just assume that I want to be a writer. To be completely honest, I don't want to be a writer. I studied English so I could be a reader and an analyzer, not a writer. I've never felt like I had a good explanation as to why, but I think I might have done it. I don't think in smooth coherent statements. I never really did. Ask Quinton. (He was a friend of mine in undergrad that was on a one-man crusade to perfect my transitions-he may have almost succeeded in my senior capstone project.) I think in horribly disjointed ideas that rarely relate to each other. Lists are the easiest way to connect these ideas. Stack them on top of each other and throw in a bunch of bullet points and they don't have to flow nicely-they're not supposed to. IT'S A LIST FOR PETE'S SAKE!!!
Having stated that, here's my to do list for today:
1) run
2) clean off spare bed
3) laundry
4) clean off cedar chest
5) catch up on my reading
6) take a nap
7) enrichment
That's about it...wish me luck.

Monday, September 7, 2009

I woke up at 7:30 this morning in a mad panic that I was going to be late for work. I then remmembered that is Labor Day. Yay for a good holiday!

Sunday, September 6, 2009


i had a friend give me some homework for a sunday afternoon. i'll always accept sunday afternoon homework. i was told to read 2 talks from general conference: 1) faith in adversity by rafael e pino, and 2) temple worship: the source of strength and power in times of need by richard g scott. loved both talks. here are my thoughts on both, (broken as they may be...)
faith through adversity, taking us to the temple where we make covenants and receive more strength enabling us to face more adversity, etc. in e' scott's talk, he discussed the death of his son and stated: "but we had faith in our heavenly father, and we put our trust in him feeling that we were his chosen people and had embraced his gospel, instead of sorrow, we felt to rejoice that the day of our deliverance had come." what's the difference between his usage of 'faith' and 'trust'? is there a difference between the two or are they interchangeable? i've also always been a HUGE fan of his view of trials, "i have never asked why but rather what is it that he wants me to learn from this experience." (almost to the point that is has been called my soap box.) as far as the temple itself goes...i love the place. it brings me great joy, and more than that, peace. i was talking to someone (really, now, i have absolutely no idea who it was) whose goal it was to go to the temple just often enough that it was inconvenient-that way it was still some sort of sacrifice. e' pino's talk hit one of my favorite scriptures, "peace i leave with you, my peace i give unto you: not as the world giveth, give i unto you. let not your heart be troubled, neither let it be afraid". given, i've never lost a 3-year-old daughter, but it goes back to e' scott's theory, 'what can i learn from this?' if we accept the lord's will and his help, he won't leave us alone. it's all up to us, "if our lives and our faith are centered on jesus christ and his restored gospel, nothing can ever go permanently wrong. on the other hand, if our lives are not centered on the savior and his teachings, no other success can ever be permanently right." gotta love pte hunter. there's something about prophetic insight.
now you've had some williams insight. take it for what it's worth.

Wednesday, September 2, 2009

my happy thoughts for the day...

2 nights ago I made a genius discovery. Finally, after 2 years of patiently waiting, I found a Jimmy John's less than 45 minutes away from my house. In fact, it is less than 4 minutes away from my place of employment. I went there for lunch today and declared myself as "perfectly content" for the rest of the day. Really, I haven't had a complaint yet. I did make on observation as I was walking out to my car today. I take so many things for granted.
*2 years ago I moved here absolutely thrilled by the mountains. I realized today that it has been weeks since I actually looked at them.
*Central Air and Heat. I will forever be grateful for my water heater. Chile cured me of that. I have to keep reminding myself that the AC is a blessing as I shiver in my 50 degree windowless office.
*My cell phone. I can talk to anyone, anytime I want.(As long as they answer.)
*The plan of salvation. Wow. Life is literally less painful with a knowledge that death is a temporary separation-nothing more.
*I have good friends in half of the fifty states and on a few continents. That gives me make-shift beds on floors in lots of locations in the case that I catch cabin fever.
*Speaking of cabin fever (or not at all), I hear we've had some fabulous weather as of late. I'd like to appreciate it more.
*I can stand up, sit down, walk, run, climb stairs, and sleep on concrete without feeling pain. My body really doesn't hate me.
I am so blessed and now resolve to NOT take it all for granted.

Saturday, August 29, 2009

so i live with my grandmother. my friends have been mildly concerned about me because i've seen far too many rogers and hammerstein musical as of late. let's be honest here, they're quality entertainment but not always appreciated in 2009. i'd like to make the announcement that we have branched out this evening. tonight we're watching LIFE WITH FATHER. i'm only half paying attention, but i have been highly amused by 2 things:
1) 15 year old elizabeth taylor. she announced that she plays the piano and coyly asks the yale man if he "plays duets" with his violin. i'd forgotten she was ever that young.
2) the new york financier clarence day asks "why did god make so many fools and democrats!?!" as he read the morning paper. ha! i wonder what he'd have to say about socialized medicine.

Monday, August 24, 2009

remember the poll?

a conclusion has been reached. just booked a caribbean cruise. i feel pretty good about that. i feel even better about the fact that i booked it for JANUARY!!! i predict that i will love my life in january, however, i just may hate myself in february. we'll see...

Sunday, August 23, 2009

lessons from little boys

1) I was home a few months ago on a fast Sunday. One little boy got up to share his testimony and said "I'd like to bear my testimony that my parents have faith in me". I've been thinking a lot about that over the past few months. I think I'd like to say the same.

2) Apparently, when my father was a pre-teen his family drove across the country for a family vacation. This was pre-air conditioning. They bought blocks of ice, stuck them in pans, and drove to Washington, DC with their feet on ice blocks.

3) While at church meetings today, I noticed a boy 2 rows ahead of me trying to wait patiently for the meeting to start. He quietly pulled out his notebook and pen and then after his dad (who was ushering) left, he pulled a handfull of little green army men out of his pocket and lined them up on the arm of the bench. At the same time, the choir was singing chorus of "The Spirit of God" and the "armies of heaven" have never been so real. The boy's father returned and the army men were forced back into the pocket, but image will always be there.

Friday, August 21, 2009

pulling out all stops...

I know. What exactly does that mean? I have an answer. Approximately 12 years ago I took organ lessons with my mother and brother. Pipe organs use "stops" in the pipes to change the pitch, tone, and quality of the sound. "Pulling out all the stops" lets ALL the air go through: full effort, no restrictions.
This is how I'm currently feeling. New life: full effort, no restrictions, HOLDING BACK NOTHING. For the 5 of you that read this that are not family members, a little back ground-I have just moved in with my grandmother. Now, what exactly does that mean? I'll tell you what that means. That means I'm still working at the good old doctor's office. It means I live in a blissfully quiet neighborhood with very few distractions so that theoretically I could study for the GRE and go back to school like I've wanted for the past few years. THEORETICALLY being the key word there. Approximately 5 times over the past week, I've had the same conversation with my mother (bless her for listening) about the education that I'm currently receiving. I can't take classes on this and there isn't a college out there that will give me credit for what I'm currently learning. But I have decided that there is merit to the "all your heart, might, mind, and strength" concept. It's not an inverse relationship: the more I give, the more I get.
For example: My relationship with my grandmother.
When I was 19-20 I heard, "I was married by the time I was your age" for the first time. When I was 20, she told my parents she'd give me $5 just to smile at a boy. I'm not an overly social person and I'm okay with that. I'm happy the way I am. I have, however, always felt mildly inadequate in comparison to my cousins who are married or always dating someone, and because of that have kept my social life/calendar completely underground when it comes to Grandma. Now, the whole moving in with Grandma part...this is where it gets (or could get) highly complicated. I could keep myself completely secretive/reclusive, or I could talk to her. I was talking to a friend about the move and he reminded me what a blessing it could be because of all the things I could learn from her. Taking his advice, I've pulled out all stops and have had some great conversations with my grandmother that I wouldn't change for anything. She is a truly great woman and she has some pretty intense trials coming her way, but at the same time, this is my chance to give back to her-thank her for all the things she has done for me and my family. It's not an easy move. Old people a quirky and set in their ways, but let be honest here, I am too. The trick is serve selflessly, pulling all the stops, and the blessings will come at the same ratio.

Tuesday, August 18, 2009


so i just had a genius realization or maybe two or three...
1) my youngest neighbor is at least 55. (bless the retiree's HOA.)
2) i've made the big move from the crazy college town drivers to the world of semi-oblivious old people in assault vehicles also known as grandma cars.
3) time is relative thereby creating a relative 4th dimension. my 4th dimension is completely dependent upon other people. current game plan: create my own 4th dimension.

Sunday, August 16, 2009


I'm pretty sure that is the best adjective I can come up for this one, however "intense", "sick", and "enough to kill a person" may be close runners up. Check THIS out.

Wednesday, August 12, 2009

paganism at it's finest.

the stars finally aligned themselves and god blessed me.

i know. highly ironic statement. maybe it was because i just had a shakespearean weekend, or maybe it has something to do with the meteorshower, but this is a thought that crossed my mind at work today when for some reason everything managed to work itself out in the last 10 minutes just before i left. not going to lie, it happens regularly. it's something that i learned on my mission. one conference pte faulkner talked to us about nephi going forward not knowing beforehand what he was going to do. so he didn't know what they were going to do-it wasn't for a lack of trying. he had tried plan a, b, c, d, etc before he fell to the "not knowing" plan. it's just living proof of the concept of "after ALL we can do" the lord picks up the rest and for that, i'm eternally grateful.

Monday, August 10, 2009

above all have a good time!

while in DC earlier this year i saw julia child's kitchen. it was kind of a cool place and really more than anything, i enjoyed some of the quotes they had listed for her. ABOVE ALL HAVE A GOOD TIME! is the one i needed more that anything because i really don't seem to enjoy my time in the kitchen, but the quote that amused me more than anything was I'M A KNIFE FREAK and now i know that they weren't stainless steel. after having "one of those days" i found myself discussing my current diet with my dietitian, she recommended 2 things: good quality dark chocolate and JULIE AND JULIA. it sounded like a viable recommendation so i went along with it. after a quick trip to good earth, we each walked into the movie theater with a bar of dark chocolate with cacao and chili pepper. i've never had a better combination.
about julie: i'm inspired to cook and to blog. i can relate to the late-20-something-year-old holding down a second-rate job that is paying the bills, cobb salad lunches (however mine seem to come more in the form of jamba juice and ice cream runs), and the simple life leaving her yearning for a deadline and not knowing exactly how to go about it.
about julia: i knew absolutely nothing about her story before the movie, but it fascinates me. good for her. heels, cooking school, rejections, mccarthy trials, and all...that woman needed a change and made her own opportunities.
i'd like to think it inspired a change in my life. we tried for an impulse buy at barnes and noble, but it was not to be...no MASTERING THE ART OF FRENCH COOKING was not to be found and secretly i was glad. (i'm not so sure that i'm really into french cooking and i don't want to go through 368 recipes in 365 days). i did find something similar-JULIA'S KITCHEN WISDOM: Essential Techniques and Recipes from a Lifetime of Cooking. i considered that a worthy substitution. i'm okay with JUST the essentials. perhaps one day, i'll bone a duck, but i don't know that i see that in the near future. my first goal is ABOVE ALL HAVE A GOOD TIME! and i plan on taking it one step at a time. wish me luck!

Tuesday, August 4, 2009

it's news to me...

so i was on the phone with an insurance company yesterday and tina, the woman i was speaking with, shared with me a piece of information that i somehow hadn't learned before...
apparently KISS has a song named "shandi"
i don't currently have internet access with a computer with speakers, so an analysis of the lyrics will have to do for now. this is what i came up with.
who would have ever guessed that KISS had a song with my name in it? and not just any song-but a LOVE song!?! i had no idea that KISS even did love songs. apparently i inspire tranquility and love. there you go...

Sunday, July 26, 2009

bobby. or sammy.

meet bobby. or maybe his name is sammy. to be completely honest with you, we have absolutely no idea. he looks really angry in this picture, but that isn't accurate in the least. in all reality, he ran all over trying to get IN our pictures. the only problem was once he got in the picture, he wouldn't hold still.

"Look! I can make a snow angel!" he really said that. that is really what he's doing in the picture. i told him he could be in the picture but he had to hold still. he apparently didn't approve. i'm not going to lie. the kid cracked me up. he stood in the picture and then wanted to see how it turned out. when i had strategically cropped him out, he wanted to see the picture and know where he was. after we had laughed at him for a while, we decided that we needed photographic evidence that this kid existed so we told him we'd take his picture and you saw how it turned out. we also saw him run through the sprinklers. yup. the sprinklers. as his highly observant parents drug him away we heard him yelling "no mom! i want to get wet again!" he brought little pieces of joy to my life and for that i will forever chuckle and be grateful. thank you bobby. or sammy. or whatever your name really is.

Friday, July 17, 2009

There is an unofficial list of things that every person should do at least once in their life: see the ocean, sing and dance in the rain, go toilet papering, etc. I completed one of those things this week. I went to my first midnight showing of a highly anticipated movie. Somehow I managed to miss all of STAR WARS and THE LORD OF THE RINGS, but this week I saw HARRY POTTER AND THE HALF BLOOD PRINCE. Now, I will freely admit that I'm not perfect. That means that I did not line up at 2:00pm the day of to get the "best seats", but I did go to the midnight showing. Never in my life have I been to the midnight showing of anything. To be completely honest, the night I graduated from high school my father told me that he could count on one hand the number of times I had been out past midnight in my life. I was completely fascinated by the people I found at the theater. As I watched those around me, I found all sorts to observe: the teenagers at the front of the line dressed in the Hogwart's school uniforms using drumsticks for wands, the 12-year-olds just in front of us who were also "first timers", Grandma down at the end of the row munchin' on her dippin' dots, and the would-be entrepreneur who wandered around outside with wands for $5 (he entered the theater empty handed). There are all kinds. I'm not going to lie, I was a bit skeptical when I heard "FIGHT! FIGHT! FIGHT! FIGHT!" and my first thought was "are you kidding me!?! who's going to be kicked out of the theater tonight?" to my pleasant surprise I looked up to Harry and Draco dueling in the aisle. Nice effect. I was amused. Somehow, I made it through the TWILIGHT preview (don't ask unless you really want to know) and found myself cheering with the rest of the crowd as the credits rolled and the familiar strains of the theme song floated through the theater. There is an energy that comes with the perfect crowd in the perfect theater for the perfect show. About an hour in, we had an "intermission". That's what happen when the power goes out. It could have been a highly awkward situation, but really it was nice to stretch my legs. I chuckled when the healer-next-to-me's wand came out for a simple "reparo" and soon thereafter Ron, Hermione, and Harry reappeared on the screen. Somehow, I made it through the rest of the night without so much as a yawn. I'm sure it was the energy of the crowd that got me through the night and the next day. As I shared my adventures the next day, one of the girls I work me told me "Hey! We should go to the midnight showing of TWILIGHT!" Nope. Not a chance. Harry Potter? Yes. Definitely possible. I've seen the ocean more than once. I've danced in the rain more than once. I could go to more than one midnight showing. Here's to November 2010.

Monday, July 13, 2009

Wednesday, July 8, 2009


I found a quote on a magazine cover in my waiting room today:

Ah, summer, what power you have to make us suffer and like it.

I just made the mistake of sitting down and thinking about everything that I have done in the past 3 weeks. I decided that there is a very good reason that I am exhausted and my body hates me. Is it a bad thing to want a vacation from summer?

Tuesday, June 30, 2009

lessons of the day...

1) Well behaved women rarely make history.
2) Don't take yourself too seriously.
3) There are some movies that really do get better EVERY time you watch them.
These lessons are lessons that I learn regularly. One day they may actually stick.

Tuesday, June 23, 2009

for Elizabeth...

when I was a junior and still trying to decide whether I really-REALLY wanted to be an English major, I had a neighbor who actually had a degree in creative writing. I remember talking to her about what happens post graduation and what to do with the degree. she mentioned the fact that one morning she woke up and found herself deconstructing her cereal box and decided that she needed to move on. I had a similar experience today. so I work for a psychologist. sometimes he needs a little prodding. I've learned that there a few things that work: mountain dew, almond joy, origami notes, and recently I've learned that REECE's PUFFS is also found on that list. my REECE's PUFFS experience is limited. I think I've had it once...maybe twice and that was years ago. for the most part, I don't eat sugared cereals, but for some reason today left me craving REECE's PUFFS. I stopped on my way home and bought myself a box. this is what I found on the box.
18 THINGS TO DO BEFORE YOU'RE 18: (apparently their target audience is not the 20 something single white female.) well then, let's see how I measure up.
1. Ride the world's biggest rollercoaster: I've been to lagoon, disneyland, six flags, and driven I-80 through wyoming.
2. Bungee Jump! repelling is the closest I've tried.
3. Score the winning goal/basket: I answered one question at the lit wit knowledge bowl. pretty sure the answer was either bill watterson or calvin & hobbes.
4. Win an award, trophy or prize: I went to the regional spelling bee in 6th grade.
5. Learn an instrument: piano, trombone (it's been YEARS!), and dabbled with the nose flute.
6. Go backstage at a gig. I worked backstage in junior high. it's where I learned to carry a gun.
7. Meet your idol. most of them are dead, but I did have my picture taken with elder bednar and published in the church news.
8. Play a part in your favorite TV show. TV? eh. I'm trying to live a life that's novel worthy.
9. Meet someone with your own name. rumor has it there are about 20 of us in the world. I do, however, have an alcoholic beverage that shares my name.
10. Make a discovery: I brined a turkey once. it was INCREDIBLE and a complete accident.
11. Get away with the perfect practical joke: due to potential repercussions, I avoid prank wars. that does not mean that I don't have ideas collected in my memory bank. ask me sometime...
12. Own a pointless collection. I keep a lot of random trivia in my head. there are always the "flying cow" stories. I do collect postcards. someday I intend to visit ALL of those places.
13. Invent a word that makes it into the dictionary. I'd like to think that I really could do that, really. I would have to argue though, that there are MANY ridiculously cool words in the dictionary that people don't use anyway.
14. Conquer your biggest fear. well...I learned spanish. I lived in a world without mountains. I learned to love the great outdoors. still haven't mastered that whole talking to boys thing...
15. Raise money for charity. I helped build a house in south america.
16. Pass your driving test the first time. check. done and done.
17. Complete a road trip coast to coast: I've dipped my feet in the ocean at both coasts. I've driven at LEAST half way across the country multiple times. (see number 1.)
18. Reach 18 years of age - yes!!! I'd like to add the sub-text on this one as well: Embrace old age. yup. done that too. I'm even graying to prove it.
I'd like to take this opportunity to thank general mills for reminding me that I am old. ha! hardly. I refuse to get old. I would like to thank them for reminding me that I still have a lot to do with my life. done and done.

Thursday, June 18, 2009


i have a brother-in-law-in-law. his sister married my brother. i'd like to publically thank him for saving me from myself during this wonderful experience that i'd like to hope is just a 24 hour flu bug. last time i saw him i told him i wanted a new hobby, foreign films. he ever so graciously obliged and so far he's hooked me up with spirited away, the grand illusion, and children of heaven-all of which i consider a worthy investment of my time. they've made my hours of R&R bearable. thanks again.

Monday, June 15, 2009

can this ever be a good thing to hear?

roommate says: you're going to be really grossed out when i really get a boyfriend.

and as an afterthought...the jury is still out on the trip decision.

Wednesday, June 10, 2009

it's a poll.

i just had one friend come back from hawaii; my roommate just got back from the bahammas; different friend left yesterday for mexico; and different different friend is going to aruba later this week. it's official. i feel left out. i have two questions:
1) where am i going?
2) who is going with me?

Sunday, June 7, 2009

5 things I learned at the zoo.

1) Elephants have knee caps in their back legs, but not their front.
2) 46 year-old-monkeys are still considered the dominant male even if they can barely walk because of arthritis.
3) The gestational period of a giraffe is 457 days.
4) Camels can go up to 6 months without drinking water, and no-they do not carry water in their humps.
5) Parrots live 70-80 years and will only attach themselves to ONE human.
I know...who really cares? Don't you worry...all this has been filed away in my ridiculously useless information file in my memory bank, right next to the number of packages of kool aid it would take to fill Flaming Gorge Reservoir.

Thursday, June 4, 2009

December 5, 2005

In high school I watched OUR TOWN in my AP English class. I was fascinated by the concept of a 'techie' play and LOVED the set (or lack thereof). While I loved the minimalistic set, I also loved the basic themes of living in the moment and appreciating the present like the past. Today I learned the real value behind the advice given to Emily when she was told to choose any old day. Today I found a paper dated December 5, 2005. For some reason that triggered December 5, 2005 in my life...fascinating day. I was on my mission in Camino Real, Rahue, X Region, Chile. Rahue was just across the river from Osorno and for Christmas every year the mission used the 2 zones to make up a Christmas choir for an outdoor concert in the Plaza. December 5 was the day I found out about it. The Zone Leaders called us and told us we had a meeting at the Stake Center in Osorno at 10:00. When we showed up, the Elders were singing scales and being broken up into parts. The Hermanas weren't so numerous and had previous musical history so they divided themselves accordingly. I, however, was told to sit down at the piano. I was given a list of 20 Christmas songs with an inquiry as to which songs I could and could not play. Yes, I was the pianist. I was the only one in the city that could play the piano. Ha. That's right. Let's just say that day was the beginning of a three week whirlwind which found me at the church practicing in every spare minute. I loved it. It was hard and I was busy, but it was a fulfilling feeling. I was doing good. No, not well. I was doing good things that changed the lives of those around me for the better. Hopefully, I can keep up the trend everyday...not just in December of 2005.

Monday, June 1, 2009

On gardening...

There's an old song that says:
"There's only two things that money can't buy
That's true love and home grown tomatoes"
I propose we add home grown strawberries to the
list. i've had 6 this year.

Saturday, May 30, 2009

so i work in a doctor's office...

one day a woman came in for a procedure and was rather nervous about the whole thing. she asked the OR boys if the doctor was LDS because she wanted a blessing. from what we can gather our doctor is a jewish, raised LDS, born-again christian so they told her no. she said okay, changed quickly, and waited patiently for her turn in the OR. once she got on the table, the doctor came in and she said, "i'm really nervous about this, can you give me a blessing?" in all of the goodness of his heart, the doctor turned around with his hands in the air and said, "yeah! i got this!" he grabbed the lidocaine and sprinkled some on the woman's forehead, put his hands on her shoulders, and said,"dear god, bless this woman, bless this room, and bless the people in this room...in the name of christ we pray." at the time, there were two guys (both returned missionaries) from the OR crew in the OR with him. one stood there holding a tray with his eyes wide open and mouth forced close. the other looked at him and said "i'm going to turn around and walk away right now." he did and we heard him muttering something about lightening on his way down the hall. this is exactly why i love my job.

Sunday, May 24, 2009

the adventures of the blue coat; or, that which happened during my hiatus...

roommate got married and cancelled the internet. i can't lie...it was a wonderful time in my life. i actually had other hobbies. i read. i gardened. i traveled. it was heavenly. here are some of the adventures that i had.

who knew there were "slot canyons" so close to home? i didn't.

mom and i outside the smithsonian. neither one of us had slept more than 2 hours in the past 24...i thought we looked okay.

the renwick: my ABSOLUTE favorite museum in DC.

history hasn't ever been quite so real.

my one stipulation for the trip was that i HAD to see the ocean. this wasn't the ocean, but i DID see it. it was amazing.

happy easter! let's roll eggs...

yes. it even visited split mountain canyon via raft.

the blue coat has had some incredible adventures this spring and i do love it, but the next "adventures" entry should be the chacos...here's a preview of things to come.

Sunday, April 12, 2009

easter 2009

this weekend rocked. it was a good weekend. i can't deny it. good friends. good food. bipolar weather(but there was sun in the end!). good times. church was AWESOME. i mean church is usually really great, but easter is all the more reason to have an AMAZING personal experience with jesus christ(watched the testaments and considered the faith necessary on his end to complete the atonement). the unexpected twist on the holiday was the impromptu star wars anonymous meeting just before bed. there was talk of sand monsters, light sabers, dedicated trivial pursuit games, and alternate endings, followed up closely by the standard youtube video. someone made the comment that easter 2009 would never be forgotten. 'tis true. it will not be forgotten...for many reasons.

Wednesday, April 8, 2009


*no, my name is not shanty, shancie, sandy, or shabby.
*why is it that i can buy 5 pair of regular socks for the same price i pay for one pair of nylons? i've been through 6 pairs of nylons since january 1 2009.
*if you are going to put me on hold, at least give me something decent to listen to.
*i've been home from chile nearly 3 years. is there any particular reason that NESTLE GOLD has JUST NOW re-entered my life?
*yoga is NOT for the unfocused. don't try to tell me it's easy.

Monday, March 30, 2009

wish me luck...

I'm going running for the first time since my vacation. I'm not taking rocks. Hope this works...

Wednesday, March 18, 2009

disclaimer: i'm allergic to dogs.

so i went running tonight-wait. let's back this up. last sunday i was talking with an old mission companion. she told me that she still carries rocks with her every time she goes running. i'm not going to lie...i laughed. that era of my life had completely left my memory. flash forward. tonight...i went running. as i walked out of my parking lot i noticed a few things 1) a father/20+ something-daughter duo walking their little (grandma'ish) dogs; 2) a pair of sisters (one toddler) walking on the opposite sidewalk; and 3) random dog running through the yards across the street. so it was a "stray" dog. it had a collar. it apparently has a home and an owner who loves it. the dog...being of the curious variety, ran past the little girls hesitating only to take a quick sniff (finding it unsatisfactory), and ran straight-shot to the dogs. long story short, the father yelled at the little girls and i both to take care of our dog while his daughter picked up both of their dogs. the combination of the mission, my animal allergy, and a few childhood experiences with my own father, have left me completely neutral to dogs. i don't particularly hate them, but at the same time, i have no desire to own one. for the time being, i decided that this tail-less creature with a choke-chain collar could join me on my jog if for no other reason to calm down the completely irate (grandma-ish) dog owners. he followed me for a few blocks and i thought i was going to lose him at the house with the over-sized white fur ball that likes to bark and stretch his chain every time i run by. i was wrong. he quickly reappeared. i then remembered the mission and the dogs that waited for us outside different homes and followed us around until we locked them out of our gated yard. then i remembered that i don’t have a gated yard. dang. that means he can’t follow me home. that meant i had to yell or do something to make him go away. i looked for rocks as my former companion had mentioned, but soon discovered that i have surprisingly clean streets in my neighborhood. there were no rocks to be found. that left the actually yelling at the dog. i don’t like dogs, but i don’t like yelling either. i’m what people would generally call non-confrontational-even if it is a dog. but more than non-confrontational, i’m not a dog person so the dog had to go. i opened my mouth to yell at the dog and to my shock (and secretly, pleasure) the word “sali” left my mouth. i was yelling at the dog in spanish. that made me laugh…quite a bit. i chuckled at that for most of the run home and didn’t even notice when my tail-less friend was really distracted by the over-sized white fur ball and i arrived at my house alone. looking back, the experience wasn’t too bad…perhaps i’ll have to keep running with the dogs if for no other reason than to keep up my spanish.

Monday, March 9, 2009

the weather (part deuce)

I'd like to announce that it is snowing. A LOT. Frankly, I don't care. I choose to appreciate it in all of it's glory. I think I may even run in it. Probably not. I'd probably die if I did. I will however dream of snow shoeing for the next week. Done. Weather appreciated. I think it might have something to do with the fact that my Samoas arrived today. Bless the Girl Scouts for bringing me 150 calories of bliss in 2 cookies. Yay for the Girl Scouts. Happiness in a box. Thank you Girl Scouts.

Monday, March 2, 2009

the weather...

so it's been one of those days. i was talking to my mother on my way home from work today and she told me that i was not allowed to go to family home evening. i would probably say something that i regretted and would probably embarrass myself in the process. she also told me that under no circumstances was i allowed to go home and blog. i told her that if i did blog, it would be on a nice safe topic such as the weather and that i'd go home for a run and see how things went from there. i did take a nice long run...loved it...passed 2 guys jogging and overheard "help them apply the priesthood" as i ran up to an overlook where i could actually see the temple and somehow everything was better. as far as the weather goes...it was 64 degrees when i got home from work today. it's march 2nd. i'm in utah. it's not going to last. at that point i refused to accept it. i predict that we'll have at least 1 more snow storm before summer arrives. ts eliot had the right idea when he said "april is the cruelest month". i don't think his reference was to the weather, but in utah...it definitely applies. as i was venting all of this to my mother, she told me to appreciate it while i had it-it's only 16 degrees where she is. done. weather appreciated. i realized i was contradicting my own soap box. if i can't be happy now (enjoy the weather), i most certainly won't enjoy it later. i had my paradigm shift and now vow to look positively to the weather in all forms that it manifests itself over the next 6 weeks.
that was a safe enough entry, yeah? nothing to embarrassing there,right? done. weather appreciated.

Sunday, March 1, 2009

concentration and/or titration...

really...i wanted to talk about urinalysis in this one. i have recently become highly fascinated by the things that we can learn just by analyzing a cup of urine, but really...this is not a medical journal and there is absolutely NO reason for me to really write about that. instead, i choose to write about my most recent eating habits. i'm not going to lie, they currently amuse me. well...consider this a travelogue/food diary. 4 weekends ago, i ate 3/4 pounds of carrots on my way to visit a friend (it was a 2 hour car ride.) the next week i ate a pound of carrots on my way to visit a different friend (that was a 4 hour car ride.) the week after that, i didn't go anywhere and actually set a goal to NOT eat a pound of carrots. instead, i stayed home and watched a movie. i ate nearly a pound of celery. call it the flavor of the week. after talking to my dietitian friend about this she told me that i had basically covered an entire week's dietary requirements in less than 2 hours. my question is, how is this effective? this weekend...i ate HORRIBLY. i kind of guessed that it would happen though. i helped a friend of mine move so the kitchen was pretty much in shambles all the time i was there. we ate pizza, burgers, candy, etc. by the time saturday afternoon rolled around, i felt physically ill. i'm telling you-crappy food hates me. around 4:30, i realized that i was horribly dehydrated. how was this remedied? 64 ounces of gatorade...in less than 2 hours. ridiculous. we'll not talk about how many trips i then had to the bathroom, but i'm telling you, it's probably less than one would think. i was REALLY dehydrated. apparently, i haven't quite learned it all yet, and i've discovered that this applies not only to food in my life. i can either read the entire book of mormon in one day or else i can spread it out over six months and read a little every day. i can run a marathon in one day, or i can run a few miles 4 times a week(does anyone besides me find that comment humorous?). i can take a bottle of medicine in one dose, or i can take a little during the day as prescribed by my physician. you know? the lord knew exactly what he was doing when he gave us the word of wisdom and told us to have a little of everything and all things in moderation. the pharmaceutical companies made a genius discovery when ER(extended release) formulas were created. the prophets know what they are talking about when they tell us to read and pray daily. my favorite part of all of this is that i realized all of this while considering the many facets of urinalysis.

Tuesday, February 24, 2009

Insert [Name] here...

Dear [Name],
I hate your stinkin' guts. You make me vomit. You are the scum between my toes.
[Your Name]

Sunday, February 22, 2009

Sunday Evening Post...

Today in Relief Society we discussed Thomas S Monson's talk, FINDING JOY IN THE JOURNEY. One thought that has frequented my mind over the past month is enjoying the NOW. If I'm not happy now, I won't be happy later. It doesn't work that way. Happiness and joy are found internally...not to be confused with the external influences that bring superficial comfort that frequently substitutes itself for pure happiness and joy. In light of that thought...these are a few things that helped me have a good day today.
-a new skirt
-multigrain saltines
-the smell of fresh cilantro
-my nephew's smile
-chatting with my grandmother
-pure testimony
-good music
-musical clips
-taking notes
-the basics: faith, repentance, baptism, the Holy Ghost, enduring to the end, etc
Really, "men are that they might have joy." It is a gift for all of us, if we are willing to search for it. I'm ready for the treasure hunt of a lifetime.

Monday, February 16, 2009

for mom...

the other day i was chatting with my mother and she asked me why all my blog posts are posted near midnight. i told her i use it to wind down at night. it's the truth. this one is for you mom. i took nyquil 2 hours ago and am now settling in for a blissful sleep with my vicks vaporizer. sweet dreams...

Thursday, February 12, 2009

single somethin' or other...

Starting in the middle of January, a series of events have prepared me for the glorious day of February 14, 2009. Lessons, talks, books, conversations...all have tried to influence me to have a positive experience with St. Valentine's Day this year, and frankly-I'm amused by it. I get the feeling that society is concerned by my attitude toward the celebration of such holidays. Last night while, I was trying to fall asleep, I went over some of my most memorable Valentine's Days in my lifetime: a) 5th grade. We made our own boxes. I sliced my finger open while scoring the posterboard for my secret crush's box. Still have the scar; b) Rexburg. I remember standing in one of the most beautiful snowfalls I've ever seen and nearly crying because there was SO MUCH snow and I was severely lacking in Vitamin D. Also, had my first quality experience with NyQuil. Went to Wal-Mart for the supply and went home to bed. Missed my roommate dancing at half-time of the basketball game, but was pleasantly surprised when two very dear friends showed up with a Valentine/Get Well card and a box of chocolates. Still have the card. c) Last year. I had a short day at work and went home to have my own little "single-awareness" evening. Instead I went to visit my brother and help him clean his house for his first Valentine's Day with his wife. I stood there and felt the first of a series of heart-breaks that helped me to realize (once again) that the Lord is in charge and it all works in HIS timetable. Later that night my brother and sister-in-law showed up with a flower for me. I felt loved to say the least.
This year I choose to find people who love me or need my love and spend time with them. It doesn't have to be a "single-awareness" day. I just watched SOME LIKE IT HOT. I don't think it gets much more appropriate...love, flowers, pretty girls, St Valentine's Day massacre, Chicago mafia, Jack Lemmon and Tony Curtis in drag, Osgood-land. What is there NOT to love about this movie? It's a classic. There is so much to be learned from Sugar's attraction to tenor sax players even though she KNOWS that they are nothing but trouble. And then there are always Osgood's famous last words, "nobody's perfect." This year, I choose to accept that thought/concept and embrace the fact that nobody is perfect and I look forward to St Valentine's Day with something like unto optimism. Go team. Don't let me down...

Tuesday, February 10, 2009


In all reality, this is not the first post I have written called "denial". In all reality, it probably won't be the last either. The first was a response to the past week in which I really decided that most of the world lives in denial. It was illustrated by points taken from recent film (ie THE BUCKET LIST and HE'S JUST NOT IN TO YOU) and recent experiences from my life and the lives around me, but then reality hit me. MY BEDROOM LOOKS LIKE A NUCLEAR TORNADO HIT IT!!! I realized it is because I have partially finished projects ALL over the room. It is literally ridiculous. This is the conclusion that I have come to. If my mother were to see it, she would ground me. In the spirit of my mother (because I do love her), I have officially grounded myself until my bedroom looks like a real person lives there. If that entails re-arranging furniture, so be it. Something has got to change. Denial is no longer acceptable. I am embracing reality.

Thursday, February 5, 2009

the never ending awkwardness...

remember larry? he's married now. (way to keep the commitment!) his wife came with him to his appointment today. (yay for the happy couple!) now, as the receptionist, i do a lot of "filtering". management doesn't always want to to talk to EVERY patient that walks in. i was a bit surprised when larry's wife stephanie (name once again altered for hippa compliance) walked right up to me and asked to speak with the office manager. i asked her what it was in regard to and she told me that she had heard that we were hiring and was interested in applying for a job. REALLY!!! can my life get any more awkward? oh wait...shouldn't have asked that question. i just cursed myself. someday i'll learn, right? i'm pretty sure that this is some higher power's way of keeping me humble. yay me. i'll learn someday.

Sunday, February 1, 2009


1) I don't like fish, but I do like sushi.
2) I was on the Math Team in high school.
3) I love Utah sunrises and Nebraska sunsets.
4) I graduated from college in English and did not read another book for 3 years.
5) I tend to over analyze things…to the point that my father (the straight-faced courtroom attorney) told me that I suck the fun out of things.
6) I hated everything about the great outdoors until I was 18.
7) I never wanted to learn Spanish.
8) I am perpetually lazy.
9) I write with my left hand to make myself stay awake.
10) Currently, my greatest fear is chronic pain.
11) I have worn the same pajamas since 2002. LOVE SCRUBS!!!
12) I am totally and completely fascinated by the human body-but not enough to study medicine.
13) Since I graduated from college my attention span has decreased exponentially.
14) I run without music.
15) I have a memory bank full of useless trivia.
16) I am a copy artist. I rarely have an original idea.
17) I don’t drink soda and don’t really eat candy-my body hates me when I do.
18) I have a freakish memory.
19) I knew who Frank Sinatra was before I knew who Tom Cruise was.
20) In 3rd grade I was voted most studious.
21) I broke the same elbow twice in less than one year.
22) I’d rather sleep than eat—but the more tired I am, the more I fight going to sleep.
23) I have paid for one hair cut in the past 6 years.
24) I have plans to see the Pacific and Atlantic coasts before Mother’s Day.
25) I have no idea who is playing in the Super Bowl.

Saturday, January 31, 2009

I have to quit answering questions...

I was at work one day and one of our patients requested to speak with me. I was in the back, but I came out the following conversation ensued. (Names have been changed for HIPPA compliance.)
Larry: I have to preface this by "I'm getting married."
Me: Really? Congratulation! That's so exciting!
Larry: But I just have to know-are you married?
Me: No.
Larry: Engaged?
Me: No.
Larry: Dating someone?
Me: No-contentedly single.
Larry: I saw you wearing a ring...
(I wore a ring once. It was April Fool's Day.)
Me: No, I don't wear jewelry. -showing my hands for proof-
Larry: Well, I just want you to know-I think you are a beautiful woman and I love your personality. And I really wanted to ask you out once, but I couldn't get the guts to do it.
Me: (What the junk?!?) Oh.
Larry: I have to know. If I had asked you out, would you have said yes?
Me: I don't know Larry. I was kind of dating someone there for a while. It depends on where things were with that.
Larry: Oh...okay.
Now. Adding a little more detail to the story, Larry is 41. I...am not. To quote our dear friend Charlie Brown, "GOOD GRIEF!"-how the devil do I get myself into these things? I know-it really isn't my fault. Sometimes things just happen. (yay for opportunities for learning and growth.) But this is my concern, THE MAN WAS ENGAGED!!! Is there no commitment in that?!? Seriously now...some are concerned by lack of importance that people are placing on marriage and the home and family. Frankly, after this experience (and others-Larry isn't the only offender) I'm not surprised. Until people value their word and the commitments that they have made, there will always be a reason for concern. But in the mean time...we know that I'm amused to say the least.

Wednesday, January 28, 2009

Life is not the way it's supposed to be. It's the way it is. The way you cope with it is what makes the difference.
Virginia Satir

Sunday, January 25, 2009

this weeks goals

1) get a better attitude about cold and sleet.
2) find a GOOD recipe for minestrone.
3) run 4 days this week.
4) finish alice in wonderland.
5) keep a clean space on my floor.

Saturday, January 24, 2009

tribute to my nephew.

Thanks to my nephew, I am currently baby-sitting for the first time since I was 16 years old. That was a while ago. Luckily, we have an understanding. I'll be the cool aunt as long as he behaves himself. So far...it's working out perfectly. He's sleeping his little heart out and I still have all my hair. (He has entered the "grabby" phase. I forgot and wore it half down.) Babies have quite the talent for creating nostalgia and pensiveness in peoples lives and I will freely admit I am not immuned to it all. When I'm with him, I want to secure my title as 'the coolest and favorite aunt' so I'm always planning things for us to do and things I'll get to teach him. I think I've got dinosaurs in the bag (three years at Dinosaur National Monument will educate anybody.) Books? I'm all over it! Recently, however, I have realized that there is a huge deficiency in my "cool aunt" knowledge. The whole super-hero bit?...well, let's just say I have some work to do on that one. I remember playing "concentration" at a family reunion and getting burned by my cousin in the "super hero" category. I'm sorry, but more than Adam West's original BATMAN with the POW! BAM! and WHACK!-I'm kind of uneducated. Frankly, it never really interested me. For some reason, the past 6 months I have been fascinated by them. I think it all stems from THE DARK KNIGHT, but I don't really know for sure. Coincidentally, I still haven't seen it, but have every intention to do so. In my over-analyst way of doing things, I have recently decided that there has to be more them than fictional characters trying to save the world in body suits and tights. I then set out to find a deeper meaning and I will gladly report that I did find one. (These theories are based purely on my recent viewing of BATMAN BEGINS and SPIDERMAN.)
*Of what use is a super hero without a villain?
Spiderman was considered a menace to society until the Green Goblin showed up. Batman never took on all petty thieves of Gotham City by himself, he only stepped in when there was a REAL threat.
*As of late, one of my favorite thoughts/concepts is that "any idiot can survive a catastrophe, but it takes a real man to survive the day-to-day." Now, don't think that I don't appreciate a good super hero, because I do, but I wonder what they themselves think of it. For example, when given the opportunity, Spiderman refused MJ because he was concerned for her wellness. Rachel refused Batman for the similar reasoning.
Really...I'm currently fascinated. Nephew and I have a lot of learning to do. I do understand that there are 2 uncles in the family that may very well take over the super-hero education,but frankly, I like learning myself. I think it's good for me. And super-heroes amuse me.

Sunday, January 18, 2009

the greatest (and simplest) year EVER!!!

for some reason, this year i've felt a great need to establish some good new year's resolutions. frankly, this baffles my mind. at one point, my father told me that one major difference between my brother and i was the fact that he was really goal oriented and i am not. (hence the lack of resolutions in my life.) a few years ago i set one resolution and that was to read THE MIRACLE OF FORGIVENESS. i actually did it. yay me. the next year, my resolution was to get in shape and read JESUS THE CHRIST. not going to lie-those resolutions fizzled...rapidly. this year, however, i have felt an aberrant motivation to set some goals. i suppose this could result from some of the resolutions that i have heard others set for this year-for example:
1) the 18-year-old heroin addict that tells his mom he's going to get clean this year;
2) the woman who is tired of never completing her resolutions sets the resolution to make and keep weekly goals rather than the BIG 5 for the year;
3) "the plunger of shame"-a roommate goal to get healthy in 2009; or
4) the sleep-deprived woman who says she's going to sleep more.
be it because of one of these goals, or some internal need for progression, goals have been on my mind for the past 18+ days. i'd thought about them to the point of giving up on articulating them in way that any brain besides my own could comprehend. ultimately, it was a talk in sacrament meeting today that solidified my thoughts. the topic was 'if ye are prepared, ye shall not fear'. our high councilman talked about how having an attitude of optimism reinforces the faith necessary to feel peace in an uncertain world.(wow. that sounded long and complicated. really, it wasn't.) the thing that stood out in my mind was that we should do something daily to prepare ourselves physically, mentally, and spiritually. (PERFECT!!! he stated it so well!) with my current job, i don't feel like i'm progressing like i could/should/want to. i realize this because i come home emotionally hammered, but that's just about it. i don't feel like my brain has been stretched. i lay in bed at night with something nigh unto restless leg syndrome and think "wow. i should stand more." really-living in a world that is full of nothing but emotions is highly over-rated and frankly, painful. for this cause, i am setting one, 3-part resolution for myself this year. i will do one thing daily to better myself physically, mentally, and spiritually. i don't know whether that means that i will be running a marathon or taking the stairs this year. really, i may go back to school this year, or could just read more REAL books and less fluff. i could read all the sunday lessons before sunday, or i could write my own topical guide with cross-references to catholicism, judaism, and/or evangelical doctrines. i think, this is why i love 2009. the possibilities are endless. i can make of this year exactly what i want it to be. i just hope that i take advantage of every opportunity that i am given and make the most of it.