mission impossible?

really the basis of this entry started in november. i walked in to work about a week before thanksgiving and the girl i share an office with was chuckling to herself. her mother-in-law had called the night before requesting "3, maybe 4, no 5 ought to do it" butterball turkey breasts. i suppose this should be prefaced. the mother-in-law lives in california. to comply with the request, it would require a suitcase full of frozen poultry. as we chatted over this concept we laughed to the point of tears. not going to lie, the concept of turkeys going though the x-ray machine nearly knocked us off our chairs. luckily for her, the local grocers-ALL OF THEM-we not stocked to supply the needed poultry and her mission failed.
two weeks later i went with a friend of mine to drop her brother off at the airport. at that point i witnessed him stuff a bag of food from mcdonalds into his hoodie to try and sneak it in through airport security. i thought that was amusing to begin with. then the roommate told me that the day before he had snuck an entire pizza into a movie theater. now THAT, i would like to see.
i've pretty much given up on driving home. the drive nearly kills me every time, so i've taken up flying...with gas prices as they have been, the price is actually competitive. flying home for christmas i sat next to a woman that made me think of the past two stories. her final destination was houston for christmas part 2 with her daughter. she shared with me the fact that her suitcase was currently housing a ham, swedish meatballs, and five cans of stephens hot cocoa. wow. she wins. no contest. i have yet to decide whether or not i want to play the game, but apparently i have quite the load to live down...
the things we do for food.